"How long, O LORD? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and every day have sorrow in my heart?" - Psalm 13:1
So many suffering believers have asked this agonized question, “How long, O Lord?” It seems to me that God relentlessly and remorselessly pursues our own holiness, and in shaping our character to conform to that of his Son, God uses agonized waiting as one of his primary tools.
A suffering father, kneeling beside the hospital bed of his comatose daughter, with tears streaming down his face asks this same question, “How long, O Lord?” Why doesn't God bring a swift resolution to this matter? Or a young, single woman, afraid of remaining single for the rest of her life but having no prospects on her social horizon asks, “How long, O Lord?” And she waits and waits. An unemployed man looking for a job searches online every day; an elderly woman wasting away in a nursing home keeps pulling back the curtain to look hopefully at the steps leading into the building; a barren woman yearning to hold in her arms the warmth of a new life grows ever more depressed by the monthly cycles of hopes raised and dashed. All these people turn their eyes heavenward with mourning and ask “How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me?” Again we ask why their loving Father, whose sovereign will cannot be resisted, does not bring swift resolution to their plights. Why does he make us wait in helpless misery?
Perhaps there is no final answer to this issue, but I believe part of the solution goes back to the program of character development into which God enrolls all who call on him for salvation. In this agonizing waiting comes a deepening reliance on God, simply because we have no other place to go. God uses this powerful tool on us in wise measure, not more than we can stand but certainly more than we would like. Other than the positive resolution to the issue concerning which we are waiting, perhaps nothing encourages us so much as knowing we're not alone; not alone in both our suffering and our waiting. If a man after God's own heart like David was made to wait and wait, asking, “How long, O Lord? Will it go on forever?,” can we who need so much more character reformation expect to go through life without experiencing the tenderizing effects of this pressure cooker?
"In this agonizing waiting comes a deepening reliance on God, simply because we have no other place to go. God uses this powerful tool on us in wise measure, not more than we can stand but certainly more than we would like."
So little in life truly moves our hearts... when God maneuvers us to a place where our hearts are deeply involved and the real issues of life are brought to the fore, he will not quickly be done with it but will keep us there as long as his loving wisdom dictates. He will keep us there, ever mindful that we are but dust - weak in faith, desperate for resolution. He will keep us there, carefully monitoring the pulses of our souls until at just the right time, he ends the lesson - sometimes bringing joy by granting our heart desires. In all this, he never loses sight of his final purpose for your life on earth: perfect conformity to Jesus Christ.
